Since a young child, men have abused me physically, mentally and emotionally. I have forgiven all, but the deep wound in my spirit/soul rears it’s ugly head at times encouraging me to think and act unbecomingly, and to say unkind things. And I fail and fall miserably.

Today, I am asking the Holy Spirit of God to apply the balm of Gilead to the depth of this wound from my young toddler age through the days of my life where the wounds were reopened and made deeper by others.

I am helpless to put the toothpaste back in the tube so to speak. I can’t erase history but I do seek God for justification — just as if I was never sinned against, just as if the wounding never occurred and to set my soul free from this entrapment. God is greater than all the powers of darkness and God permitted this wound to be reopened yesterday so He can bring healing to me.

I understand that when you even think of a person or a situation that has caused hurt and pain and there is no actual pain that surfaces with the thought, that God has completed the work of healing in the soul.

Today I am asking God to complete the work of healing so this never cycles back to me again so I can extend grace, compassion and mercy to the abusers and betrayers when I encounter them — and to walk in wisdom where they are concerned — and to do as God bids me to do at the moment.

When Jesus was on the cross, he continually forgave and he always extended love and compassion to His abusers. Help me Lord — take away my stony heart and give me a heart of flesh.

thank you for reading and hearing my heart. I confess my faults to you, Lord and to my DAB family and I thank you that as you pray, I am forgiven of my sin and untie your hands to heal my soul and dissolve history where satan wounded me through men and women