Lord, give me strength! I finally asked my (ex) boyfriend if he wants to talk this coming weekend. He answered yes – Saturday on daytime or on Sunday. I know him.. Therefore I know that he is booked up Friday and Saturday night. With another woman? It has been less than two weeks. This coming weekend is ‘our weekend’ (when I don’t have my kids). He ran away last time. We got into argument and there were strong feelings. I don’t know how it really started or what happened, but I was going to tell and explain to him how grateful I am that he wants to be in our lives despite different (family) situations. Missunderstandings happened and it all went wrong. This is a pattern. Something broke inside of me. Earlier that night he told me that he wants to be with me and only me, that he loves me… we had celebrated 5,5 years.. I’m numb. I’m shaking right now. Asking for prayers.. I can’t form the words right now.