Completely Exhausted In All Facets Of My Exisistence
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tenkai82Prayers: 7Requests: 18
September 25, 2023 at 10:14 amI will give rest to those who are weary and heavy laden (Mathew 11:28). This is the scripture in the entire that sticks out to me the most because EXHAUSTION is the human condition that I think the Christian community and general society is LEAST compassionate and understanding. My name is Justin, 40, and I’m a suicide survivor. I don’t want to talk about my life long afflictions because it would be several pages long. I’ve been seeking the Lord for 25 plus years. My first suicide attempt was September of 2010. I’m still battling all the pain and burdens that pushed me to that point. It took everthing I had to last this long and I feel I have reached the end of myself, AGAIN. I feel I don’t want to fight “THE GOOD FIGHT OF FAITH” anymore. Of all the things I hope, wish, desire and dream……rest is what I now pray for more than anything. But the blows keep coming, the attacks never cease, and I feel crushed under the weight of my burdens. I sometimes beg the Lord to LET ME GO HOME, I’m ready for my life to end. I don’t have ANYONE, I’m single. I prayed over 25 years for a wife. I don’t have a friend or family member who makes life worth this pain. My spiritual counselor, Mr. Hungerford, whom I loved and needed so dearly, passed away from stomach cancer before we could really talk about the core of my afflictions. His passing BROKE ME. I have done SO MUCH GIVING in my lifetime, out of the kindness of my soul and continue to do so EVERY DAY, but it feels like it goes unnoticed to the point where I start to feel invisible. I’m totally DRAINED EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY, MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY. The Christians in my community have become so busy and insesitive. I find myself having to chase them for help, counseling and affection. I don’t want to chase people anymore. I don’t want to go to work, nor leave my bed or continue working towards my dreams. I SEARCH, DESIRE AND CRY TO FEEL CLOSER TO THE LORD…..but He feels distant. It makes me feel like I don’t matter in the grand calculus of God’s plan. My life has no purpose or meaning, despite all the blood, sweat and tears I put into it. I feel alone. I want to die, and I really mean that in the most humble and sincere way. I regret surviving my suicide attempt………
dcannonPrayers: 2Requests: 0
September 25, 2023 at 10:17 am🙏 Praying for you dear friend!
bigwampa18Prayers: 2Requests: 3
September 25, 2023 at 10:47 amI’m praying for you and hope you come to realize how valuable you are in God’s eyes. He hasn’t given up on you. I hope you can realize and see that he’s still got a plan and purpose for you.
GCOGAPrayers: 18276Requests: 1404
September 25, 2023 at 11:14 amJustin; you were bought and paid for with a prize 🏆. GOD has plans and work for you to do. You need to continue to be present; take it one day at a time. Thank Him for health; thank Him for the air you breathe 🧘; thank Him That you have a community of believers who read your post and respond with love care prayer compassion and affection. Thank Him for all the golden opportunities that awaits you as you journey through life. Taking your life is not an option. It’s the scheme of the devil 😈 You should be thankful that your attempts did not succeed. There is a season for everyone and for everything. Persevere and continue to draw strength from all the good people who are surrounding you with love and prayers. I pray that it shall be well with you🙏🙏✨Gods speed and ♥️🙏🙏
goingupsoonPrayers: 20098Requests: 1132
September 25, 2023 at 12:11 pmHi Justin, it’s been a while. It sounds as though you are still troubled about many things. I clearly remember myself, and the DAB community praying for you not so long ago. I’m glad your still among us, and reaching out once again. After all these months, it seems as though you are still having issues entering into God’s rest. Please know that you aren’t the only one Justin. For most Christians, I would dare to say that this is something that we are all endeavoring to do on a daily basis. I read recently a good definition of what this rest is that God talks about in His WORD. 📖 The author of the article says, “God’s rest is a state, or place, where God rules and manages His Creation, free from the chaos and disorder brought about by sin and rebellion. ALL WHO WILL REST FROM THEIR OWN WORK OF BRINGING THEIR OWN LIFE UNDER CONTROL can enter into God’s rest.”…… What I get from this Justin is this, “and the Scriptures will verify this.” Is in order to enter into God’s rest, we need to cease from our own works, (or our own self efforts). (Hebrews 4:9-11) says, “So then there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God, for whoever has entered into God’s rest has also rested from his works as God did from His. Let us therefore strive to enter that rest.” I quote a statement from Joyce Myers, [Now the rest of God is not a rest from work — it’s a rest in work. It’s partnering with God to do what He’s calling you to do by His grace, and leaving the part you can’t do in His hands, trusting Him to do it]. (Hebrews 4:3) says it this way; “For we who have (believed) enter that rest…. So Justin, we start by (believing). Maybe you should ask yourself, “Am I trying to hard to enter into God’s rest?” What the Bible is telling you and I is, entering into God’s rest is certainly something that we should be striving after. But, at the end of the day, how we achieve entering into the rest that JESUS is talking about comes from, and by God’s grace, and His grace alone. Entering God’s rest is something we appropriate by faith. God offers it to us, then our role is to receive it by using our faith. Our part is to cease from our own works, (our own self efforts) and to (believe) that the way to access God’s rest is by having faith to (believe) that what God offers us, (His rest) has been freely given to us, it’s ours for the taking. A good phrase to remember is — “FAITH TAKES!” Every good thing that you and I have ever received from God, or will ever receive from God in the future is obtained by our faith. We must (believe) — first, in order to receive…… Heavenly Father, Justin need assurance that in order to enter into Your rest, he needs to cease from his own work, and to receive (Your promise of rest) by him (believing), and by his faith….. We could view it this way Justin, God’s rest is a free gift that’s given to us by His grace. it’s a present 🎁 neatly wrapped that’s just waiting for us to open. Heavenly Father, my prayer is that, Your beloved son, and our brother in CHRIST, finds the rest that You’ve freely provided, and that he’s desperately yearning for. Abba, help Justin to enter into Your rest…
Love you Justin. Praying for you often. Hang on to JESUS brother, He will never let you go.
In JESUS’ matchless Name. Amen! ❤
smesserPrayers: 10Requests: 5
September 25, 2023 at 2:36 pmJustin, (I think that is your name , it won’t let me go back and check so please forgive me if I’m wrong) I’m so sorry for all the pain you are in and have experienced for so many years. I know how it is to feel lonely, and from what you’re describing, it sounds like that extreme loneliness is leading in a major way to you feeling like life is too painful and not worth living. I’m deeply sorry for the loss of your mentor, which I imagine must have felt like the straw that broke the camels back. I also have depression and have felt suicidal many times. It is something that the typical person, even well meaning Christians, can’t relate to and because of that often say the wrong thing, or nothing, which is so frustrating or hurtful. I noticed you said the Christians in the community were too busy (or something to that effect) I definitely agree that has become a problem, and I’m heartbroken they aren’t giving you the time and attention you need. I’m wondering if you have a church home. If not, you need to seek one quickly and let the pastor know of your situation. If you do have one, please go to the leadership and let them know you need support. If they are dismissive or don’t take it seriously it is time to find a new church. Do you have a plan at this point? Or are you just craving that rest you desire? If you have a plan or are feeling s desperate as you sound please call 988 right away. It is a suicide support line. If you would like asupport group I found one online that has many different related support groups to choose from. It is: themighty.com/groupdirectory Getting a Christian counselor would also be a good idea for support. I’m having trouble remember everything else you said, but I know your pain is real, deep and horrible. But you have a community here supporting and praying for you, you are loved by God and this community, and there is Hope. Even though I know it feels hopeless right now. Think of how long Daniel was a slave and in prison, or David was in hiding before their lives were changed. Sometimes God is using the hard times to prepare us for something great. And God has a big plan he wants to use you to accomplish. He is weaving a large tapestry in your life, but all that is visible right now I’d the messy underside. I’m so sorry you are going through this and I will pray for you. Please call that hotline, use the other resources I suggested, and let us all know how you are doing. I pray peace over you and release from the bonds Satan is trying to keep you under.
bodhi02Prayers: 1928Requests: 1060
September 25, 2023 at 11:47 pmJustin I want to remind you that no matter what you physically see or feel,god is always with you and you are IMPORTANT. If you are still here,that means that god is not done with you yet. I pray for strength and peace and wisdom to be bestowed upon you and that by the power of the Holy Spirit you feel his presence working in you and that you have healing of your body,mind and spirit. Read psalm 139. It helps me to remember that no matter what god is always with us and if your heart is true then the rewards will be granted to you. In Jesus name amen
GCOGAPrayers: 18276Requests: 1404
September 26, 2023 at 10:18 amPraying for you Justin. Be encouraged and trust the lord. Take one day at a time. Everyone has one thing or the other that they pass through. No one exempted from the challenges of life. Praying for the power of the Holy Spirit to help you navigate through this tough season of life. Much 💕🙏
spiritdoc1Prayers: 63962Requests: 3629
September 26, 2023 at 10:31 amDear tenkai82; I am praying for you!
GCOGAPrayers: 18276Requests: 1404
September 26, 2023 at 12:22 pmRomans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
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