Mental Illness
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ashmotleyPrayers: 1Requests: 2
February 26, 2023 at 11:22 amI desperately need your prayers DAB family. I have struggled with depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder for the better part of my life. It has affected every relationship I’ve ever had, friends, family and romantic. I was with my ex husband for 18 years, and when we split up I jumped right into a 2 year relationship with a man who knew my history and portrayed himself to be all the things he knew I needed. He made me believe in fairytales again. We recently ended the relationship and afterward I found out that he is a completely different person than I thought he was. Now I feel like the past two years were a lie and I was being used. I feel completely unlovable and hopeless. I know that God loves me and that I should hope in Him. But I don’t feel it, and I know that my bipolar disorder will always be a part of my life, and even if have good, healthy periods, the depression will always come back. My life will always include more misery and pain than joy. I can’t see how I could ever be happy or content, my life will always be this way. And the lows are so low that I don’t know how much longer I can hold on. Last night I ugly cried for hours, begging God to take me home to Him. My faith and fear of hell are the only things that have kept me from committing suicide. But I don’t want to do this life anymore. It’s too hard, it hurts so bad. My favorite verse is Jer 11:29, For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. I believe it’s possible for God, but I don’t think he will remove this thorn from my side. I feel like he is trying to teach me a lesson, that I just keep screwing up and refuse to learn. Please pray that I can finally learn this lesson, to rely on Him and no one else. I need to learn to love myself and be ok without a romantic relationship, as I have never been a single adult. Lord, please soften my heart and make me open to receive Your instructions and stop trying to fill the hole in my heart with things other than You. If it is Your will, take this mental illness from me, but if it is not, please give me the strength and courage to continue on, and learn the lesson You have been trying to teach me for the past 35 years. Carry me when I am too weak to move. Help me turn my suffering into Your glory. In Jesus’s name, Amen
AvPrayers: 339Requests: 74
February 26, 2023 at 12:13 pmI am sorry that you have and still continue to feel like this. I have also reached really low places and wished to no longer be here. one useful thing I’ve held onto is lessons from the life of Chinese missionary Gladys Aylward.
She spent her life doing the work of God in foreign, dangerous and unwelcoming places. She never married or had children of her own but at the end of her life she said:
“I’ve been one of the happiest women that has ever stepped this earth. I’ve had a great family of someone else’s children Who I have loved with a great love because Jesus Christ loved me”
It gives me hope to know that there is a higher peace and joy that comes from God alone.
I pray that for you and for me as well 🙏🏾.ashmotleyPrayers: 1Requests: 2
February 27, 2023 at 5:48 amThank you sweet friend. I will be praying for you as well. God bless you.
cinbahhPrayers: 5585Requests: 79
February 27, 2023 at 6:36 amI am joining these prayers for peace and restoration. I pray that any medical people be given wisdom to aid you. And I ask for healing and for a sense of purpose to help in your healing.
My mother was bipolar. Although it is a different perspective I saw her pain until a doctor found the right medicine for her. And she found things to do for others to focus herself. Eventually she did go off the intense meds to other things. We developed a lovely relationship before she went home to the Lord.
I pray wonderful things for you and all who struggle with this.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen. -
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